Tiny tidbits of terribly typical trickery
by XxHeartlessKissxX
Summary: Sometimes a man just has to DANCE! Drabbles about whatever my mind needs to release, all Death Note.
1. Groove thing

**A/N**: Having developed a severe case of writers mind clutter, I'm going to attempt to clean it out. So yay drabbles

**Disclaimer: **Death Note is not in my possession

**Date: 3.5.13**

**Characters**: Light/L

**Genre:** Humor/general bullshit

* * *

Light Yagami, genius teen, Kira, God of the new world, etc. had viewed a lot of bizarre things in the past year or so, but this…

He was standing uncomprehendingly in the doorway to the kitchen, his jaw open and his hair mussed, looking very much less-than Light Yagami level of perfection.

Normally he wouldn't have been caught dead in his current state, but the need for a glass of water to soothe his throat had been entirely too demanding.

Unbeknownst to him, a certain raven-haired detective had been in the kitchen already.

Light desperately wished that eye-bleach was a thing as he watched, horror-struck, as L shook his "groove-thing" singing in a rather high-pitched, although quiet voice.

_I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world_

_Life in plastic! It's fantastic!_

L completed what could only be called a pirouette, a flaming gayily fabulous pirouette, and froze, openmouthed, staring at Light.

The two genii stood in horrible awkward silence before L slowly lowered his raised arms and very neatly sat at the small table, hurriedly taking a bite out of his cake.

Light, following suit, shut his mouth and proceeded to get himself a glass of water.

The following morning went about much as usual, that was, until L opened his cake only to find a Barbie doll in the center, the cake clearly intended to be a dress, and the words, "For you, Barbie girl" in icing.

Needless to say, Light's Kira percentage jumped a hefty amount at that moment.


	2. Watari's list

**Characters:** Light, Mello, L

**Genre:** Humor/Family

* * *

"L Lawliet get your ass in here!"

L dropped his sugar cube, it had to be serious for Light to yell his full name like that and he sounded…pissed.

L reluctantly headed toward their shared bedroom, apparently not fast enough because Mello stuck his head out, "Hurry up ass."

Oh yeah, he'd done something, Mello only insulted him when it was major.

He cringed and stepped fully into the bedroom to find both men standing with their arms crossed.

"Did I…Did I ruin Mello's leather?" L remembered that fiasco a little too well and did not want to repeat it.

Both shook their heads, tight-lipped.

"Worse." Light glared and L felt dread in his stomach.

Mello flipped his hair, "You didn't tell Watari to get conditioner. He bought just shampoo. My hair NEEDS moisture!"

Light nodded seriously, "This" he gestured first to his own auburn locks and then to Mello's golden ones "takes serious effort and care to maintain and you might as well have _ruined _it."

Looking at the two of them glaring at him, Mello's hands on his hips and Lights slightly tilted hand in the air and given why they were so angry L simply stared.

"You're angry with me…because I didn't put conditioner on Watari's list?" he asked slowly.

Light nodded vigorously and Mello jerked his head, "Fuck yes we are."

L simply turned around and left, managing to get half-way down the hall before he started laughing so hard he couldn't breathe.


	3. Bajillion

**Characters:** Matt ,Watari, L

**Genre:** Family

* * *

Quillish Whammy had spent many, many years working with genius children, and he had learned a good deal in that time.

The most important thing he'd learned though, was that, genii or not, children were still prone to the misconceptions of adolescence.

Mail was about 5 when he first met L and Whammy would never forget the first words little Mail had told the man.

"You're gonna get fat if you keep eating that."

L hadn't quite known how to respond to that from a child and so had given his typical, "sugar=brain-power" response.

Now, Whammy understood what it was like to be caught off-guard by the red-head.

"I'm sorry Mail, what did you say?" He asked, clearing his throat worriedly.

The boy, now 9, blinked up at him, "How come you don't look like you ate a lemon? Roger does and he's gotta be like, a bajillon years younger than you. How old are you anyways? A hundred million bazillion years old?"

Watari wasn't sure who should feel more insulted, Roger (the apparent sourpuss) or himself.


	4. Light's a Cuntfish

**Characters:** Mello and Light

**Genre:** humor..maybe

* * *

"You…you…you CUNTFISH!"

Light Yagami looked up, eyebrows raised, from his books in time to see a blond tornado tear through the door.

"What, exactly, did I do to deserve that horrid attempt at an insult?" He inquired, purposely annoying Mello.

"You, Light Yagami, ate something this morning, something you should not have eaten if you wanted to keep your hair pretty boy." Mello was clearly incredibly pissed off.

Light frowned, "Mello, the only thing I've eaten today is a cheese Danish that Watari brought me…." His brow furrowed more, "I haven't even been in the kitchen."

Mello wasn't listening, "Yeah, yeah, whatever _Kira." _and he launched himself at Light, causing the older man to make a _very _effeminate sound. Light fought Mello back some, but Mello was a Mafioso which made him stronger than he looked.

L, reading a file, walked into the room seconds later, in time to see Mello sitting triumphantly on Light who was practically sobbing as the blond chopped at his hair with clearly dull scissors shouting, "You owe me chocolate cheesecake!" over and over.

Unconcerned L sat down and picked up the covered tray that he'd left earlier, removing the lid he smiled in anticipation, not noticing that the wrestling men were shooting death glares at him.

It wasn't until he raised a forkful to his lips that he realized his mistake.

Needless to say, L learned not to steal Mello's cheesecake.


	5. Miracles

**Characters:** Matt,Mello and Near

**Genre:** likeifuckingknowrightnow  
Sciency Crack

* * *

Mello stared, Near was frozen in place in shock, Whammy's was a total hush.

Never in a million years did anyone think it would happen ever, but there it was irrefutable proof put before them and as Genii they NEVER turned away evidence like that.

Totally unaware one Mail Jeevas continued what he was doing, cheerily shaming his Math teacher as he wrote it on the board, his handwriting impeccable for once as he grinned widely.

"You." he said, turning to face the class properly, "owe me a Million dollars."

Behind him was a ridiculously simple mathematical proof of Fermat's last theorem, written neatly just moments after learning what the theory even _was _and the solution to one of the millennium problems.

Matt returned to his seat, pulling out his game again and blowing a lock of hair out of his face as Mello totally lost his shit and hugged Near, who was crying.

Let it never be said that Mail Jeevas was not a miracle worker (or a genius).

* * *

A/N: This is total crack, If you know what Fermat's Last Theorem is, kudos.

Begin Lesson:

The original proof is unknown and though a man named Andrew Wiles has developed a working proof, it is much larger and more complex using modern mathematics, than Fermat's proof which was only slightly to big to fit on the pages of the book he wrote the actual theoerm in.

The proof is/was a Millenium problem, "In order to celebrate mathematics in the new millennium, The Clay Mathematics Institute of Cambridge, Massachusetts (CMI) established seve n_Prize Problems_. The Prizes were conceived to record some of the most difficult problems with which mathematicians were grappling at the turn of the second millennium."

When a problem is solved (keep in mind there isnt some answer key out there, these people have to discover and prove their theories nearly flawlessly and no one can say, "Oh you forgot to mention this, or yes thats right") the individual who discovered it's solution is awarded 1 million dollars.

Lesson Over.


End file.
